Fall..ing

I seriously love Fall. I love everything about it and I am lucky to live in a place where you can see it, feel it, taste it, and just live it for it's short time. The summers here are usually hotter than hot and humid to the max. By the time mid to late October gets here, I have already been sweating my butt off from refusing to wear any summer clothes after Labor Day. lol To me, there is something comforting about this time of year. It is like a hug you never want to break (which coming from me, is rare. I am NOT a hugger unless you are under age 10).

I have been going non-stop since.. well.. as long as I can remember. I am really struggling with balancing it all. Life, fun, responsibility, passion, drive, family, friends, you name it. I hate, and I mean hate, disappointing people. I feel like I have been doing that a lot lately and it's time to stop and re-evaluate some things in my life. I am sick of saying "I am going to do this.." or my personal favorite these days.. "I need to do that.." I just feel like I am falling and haven't hit the pavement..yet.

I am so exhausted and it's a really strange feeling for me. I am used to being "on the go" and "busy". I am also used to just working and that's all I have to worry about in my spare time. I have been having a lot of fun lately. Okay.. God, I said it. I am actually happy with all the great stuff I have in my life these days from professional to personal. I just don't want to fall on my face in either area. Problem is.. If I keep this pace up I inevitable will fall. Flat.on.my.face. Splat. Something has got to give, peeps. As much as it pains me to keep saying this.. I need my weekends. Photography is going to taper off soon.

That camera saved me. More than any of you will ever know. I was used to feeling (because of being told) that I wasn't really worth a whole lot, my thoughts and feelings never mattered, and I never had or got to make a lot of choices for a large part of my life. Truth is, I have hit the ground before but in true Mooney fashion.. We hit the ground running. You cannot keep Joe and Jayne's girl down... for long, anyway.

I am feeling very melancholy these days. This time of year has always been my favorite but I am coming up on 2 very hard anniversaries. I will say that the facts that each year gets a little easier, I grow a lot, and I am surrounding myself with amazing people is a plus. (Staying Positive Penny) No sulking around here. Fall and falling can be okay. I am falling into a good place and into good people.


xoxo-mere